


Kiss the Boy

by thollnds



Category: Love Simon (2018), Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Canon - Book & Movie Combination, Fluff, M/M, Post-Book, Post-Movie, its like a paragraph, some angst i guess, spierfeld
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-31
Updated: 2018-03-31
Packaged: 2019-04-16 01:05:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14153313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thollnds/pseuds/thollnds
Summary: Simon gets kicked out by his roommate for the night and has a sleepover with Bram (and still has no idea who Blue is).----The book and movie are combined in this, I'm sorry if you aren't familiar with one of them. Simon looks like Nick in Everything, Everything and Bram looks like Bram.. and the carnival scene is mentioned, so lemme tell you now that it was the one from the book. Enjoy!





	Kiss the Boy

“You’ve  _ got _ to be kidding me.” Simon groaned, slamming the top of his laptop closed and tossing it onto his pillow. His roommate stood in front of him with his hands in his pockets, and he shrugged. All Simon could do was roll his eyes. “You want me to leave so you can screw your girlfriend again?”

 

“I didn’t say that.”

 

“It’s definitely being inferred.” Simon stood up, grabbing his blanket and pillow, his laptop slid onto the mattress. “As much as I’d love to be here for that, I’ll give in and go.” He huffed, slinging his comforter over his shoulder. “The whole night?” His roommate nodded and he sighed.

 

Simon took his things out into the hall and shut the door. He didn’t have to be too careful about being caught, his RA rarely gave a shit about anything that happened on the floor, which was fun when you were sneaking milk jugs filled with alcohol into your room, but bad when your roommate was having a date night. To be frank, Simon didn’t mind room switching, but it was a lot easier before Abby transferred to the private school in Atlanta. Now, he didn’t exactly have a place to go. The entertainment room was always an option, but he risked getting caught by a different, more involved RA, and that didn’t sound too pleasing. Simon leaned his head against the door, pressing his pillow closer to his chest, and listened to the whistle of someone down the hall.

 

When _ Cute Bram _ , the boy that lived a few doors down, and coincidentally the boy he’d had a crush on since junior year of high school came into view, Simon flushed with embarrassment. A knowing smile crept across Bram’s face as he inched closer, eyeing Simon’s bedding. Simon let a shortened breath out before pushing himself off the door. A little “hey” drifted from his lips as Bram waved, passing his own room and walking towards Simon. He could feel a thudding in his ears, echoing from his chest. Cute Bram and Simon shared many moments together, in high school and college, but that didn’t stop Simon from turning into a complete moron whenever he came around. You would think after years of being completely enthralled with someone, communicating would be simpler. You would think.

 

“Get kicked out?” Bram nudged Simon’s bicep and he could feel the shock of electricity shoot through his body. Simon nodded, eyes down. Bram was wearing white, indoor soccer sneakers, and cuffed tapered pants. He was holding his UGA lanyard with his keys dangling on the bottom. He began to swing them, and Simon looked back up. Bram’s pretty, tawny skin glowed under the florescences, and dark bronze irises danced over Simon’s blushing face. They were always less than friends but more than acquaintances, he really only knew Bram through Nick, and that kept Simon’s crush at a safe level. No pining, or longing; just slightly embarrassing.

 

“Yeah, my roommate’s having his girlfriend over.” Simon’s lips lifted into a smirk, rocking back and forth on his feet. “It’s gonna be super heterosexual in there tonight.”

 

Bram laughed, it seemed forced and Simon ran his hand through his hair. He’d been growing it out, and it fell just above his shoulders. Abby loved it, Leah hated it, but Simon felt more Simon than he had in awhile.

 

“Super heterosexual, huh?” Bram was smiling. “That’s no good.” Simon’s heart pounded, he wanted the moment to end so desperately he almost turned back into his dorm. Bram crossed his arms over his own chest and bit down on his bottom lip. The image was so unholy. “Wanna stay over?”

 

Simon couldn’t say yes fast enough, and not just because he didn’t want to sleep in the entertainment room. 

  
  


Bram’s room smelled like coconut and lavender, which seemed like an odd combination but was really quite breathtaking, especially when Simon realized that it’s exactly what Bram’s always smelled like. Simon threw his blanket and pillow on the floor and thanked whatever higher power that the dorm floors were carpeted. It was only 8:30 but Simon was tired, he rubbed his eyes with his hand and flopped onto the pile of bedding on the floor to examine the room. There were sports posters, comic posters, and Christmas lights. His roommate's bed was lofted, and a clothing rack sat under it. Simon had imagined the way Bram’s room looked like many times, just for casual curiousness and the like. But now it was different, it was Bram’s room and it was neat and tidy, and surprisingly colorful. It made sense.

 

“Thank you so much.”

 

“Not a problem,” Bram kicked off his shoes and retreated to his bed. “My roommate might be in late, but I’m sure that’s better than listening to heterosexual sex, huh, Simon?”

 

Heat crept up Simon’s neck, and he could feel his heartbeat quicken, it was almost in his throat. He toyed with his fingers. “I suppose anything could be better than that.”

 

Simon had a hard time telling whether Bram was flirting with him or teasing him, mostly because he had a hard time telling whether Bram was for the other, and it sort of made Simon want the earth to open up and swallow him whole. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, he’d done that a million times before. Simon was never stoic, he had a terrible habit of making a fool of himself and never letting it go. It seemed he was always blushing, especially around cute boys who may or may not be gay. He’d avert gaze, but it never was, right now especially, enough.

 

But, Bram laughed. It was hearty, and it made Simon’s face crack into a smile. He looked up to Bram and there was a sort of connection, their eyes met and it was piercing. The room shifted, the world froze, and in Bram’s eyes was a look that no other man had ever given Simon, a soft,  _ longing _ look, and Simon couldn’t escape it. He didn’t want to. His eyes grew hazy before he blinked and the contact was lost. Simon cleared his throat, and ran his fingers through his damn hair again. Bram sat quietly on the bed, pulling out his phone from his back pocket. Truthfully, it was awkward. The silence filled the room and it was so harsh and engulfing. It wasn’t until the sound of laughter from the hallway leaked into the room that Bram looked back at Simon.

 

“Hey, you know what? Let’s have some fun tonight. Garrett left a bottle here the other night, we shouldn’t let that go to waste, now should we?”

 

Simon grinned, a smile so eager and genuine that it sent a rush of unexpected warmth through Bram’s stomach. He pat a space next to himself on the bed, and Simon fell onto it rather shyly, pulling his feet up and crisscrossing them as Bram pulled the alcohol from behind the mini fridge.

 

Simon was impressed, a real Svedka bottle. The RA had really given up.

 

Bram gently tossed the bottle on the bed, and Simon’s eyes wandered over to it as it hit his thigh. It was strawberry lemonade. Music began playing gently on the speakers across the room, the boom of the soft bass pounding along with the rhythmic beats of his heart. The night was still so young.

  
  
  
  
  
  


Simon wasn’t drunk, at least that was what he was telling himself. He knew he was lying when the words “truth or dare” tumbled out of his mouth. Bram threw back another shot, then nodded, a small smile dancing on his mouth. He brought himself closer to Simon, and let his tongue lick across his own lips. Simon was about to combust.

 

“Truth!” Bram screwed the cap back on the bottle and set it below the bed, leaning towards Simon with each movement.

 

“What would you do if you were invisible for the day?” Simon hummed, heart beating wildly, feeling the heat of Bram’s body approach him slowly.

 

The buzz of the music wafted through the air, and Simon began to sway along to it. “I think I’d have to sneak on a plane to somewhere wonderful. Like Thailand or _ something _ .” Bram’s voice was sweet and smooth like chocolate, melting into every ounce of Simon, and giving him a sugar rush. Simon pondered kissing him. “What about you, Si? Truth or dare?”

 

Simon gushed at the way Bram called him Si, usually only Leah or Abby called him that, and it was sort of endearing. Hearing Cute Bram say it though, gave it a whole new meaning, and he really thought about kissing him. “Truth.”

“What’s your favorite place in the world?” Bram wrinkled his nose as he smiled, hand falling beside Simon’s, making both their stomachs tighten.

 

_ Besides here, right now, being so close to you, cute Bram?  _ Simon thought and smiled privately. “It’s gotta be Paris, I went sophomore year with my family. My sister called me Jacques the whole trip, which was truthfully the only French word she leaned.” Simon leaned back against the wall, eyes drifting out the window. Even saying Jacques made his whole body ache with a longing for the past. He missed the emails, and he missed being Jacques, because Jacques had a person who signed every email with love, because Jacques had a Blue and Simon didn’t. 

 

And Bram froze, taking a breath in. Being around Simon was one thing, but to be reminded of everything so blatantly, it made him stiff. Sometimes Bram forgot he was Blue, sometimes he forgot how deeply and irrevocably in love he was with his Jacques. But it was always with him, haunting him like a ghost. It wasn’t a bad memory, those few months of being Blue were the happiest, truest months of his life. He would not trade it for the world. He would not trade the way he felt, and maybe still feels for Simon.

 

It was the fact that Simon still didn’t know who  _ his Blue was _ , that made Bram nervous with regret.

 

And Bram tried to tell Simon, he did. But when he didn’t show up at the carnival, and then he didn’t tell him for the next week, that week turned into a month, and after that, it seemed like it wouldn’t have made a difference. But Bram could see the difference in Simon, he could see his smile dim, the way he picked at his food and looked so sleepy like he was staying up until the wee hours of the night. It wasn’t until senior year when Simon started dating Cal Price that he became the same Simon he always was. Almost. There was still something off about him, and it was Bram’s fault, he knew that.

 

“Jacques a dit, right?” Bram smiled, it was so sad through.

 

Simon looked over at him and nodded, there was a lump in his throat. The look in Bram’s pretty brown eyes seemed so nostalgic it made Simon’s heart ache. “Truth or dare?”’ 

 

Bram outstretched his arms. “I’ll go with dare.”

 

Simon’s eyes were lidded and a dreamy smile was plastered to his face. “I dare you to tell me something nobody else knows.”

 

Bram thought, he wasn’t much of an open book, and there were plenty of things no one had any idea about him. There were some silly things like what his favorite color was and who his favorite superhero could be, but there were some serious things too, some things he didn’t even tell Jacques. Like how his mom made him go to therapy for awhile after her and his dad got divorced, and how she asked if he wanted to go again after the little fetus incident. But, there was one thing that Bram knew Simon didn’t know, a secret that he thought was going to be kept forever. 

 

There was a silent beat before the sound of Bram’s voice bounced off the walls. “I,” Bram stumbled over his words, shaking his head. He let out a breathy laugh, but nothing was funny. “I have- had a secret identity.”  _ Well, it’s true. _

 

“Huh?” Simon smiled and tilted his head a bit. “You some crime fighting hero at night, Bram?”

 

Bram shrugged. “Something like that I guess.” There was some sort of tension between them that Bram knew he had caused. His fingers traced up Simon’s hand, both their eyes were drawn to the sudden touching. He saw bumps raise across Simon’s skin, and he sort of interlocked their fingers, gently, but it was an awkward angle. “When I was him, I was everything I wanted to be on the outside. I was confident, and true, and in love. You know the feeling?”

 

Simon’s breath hitched, and Bram knew he got it. It was so simple. “I might.” Was all Simon’s shaky voice could stand.

 

Simon was sort of in a trance, Bram was touching him and hinting at something that could seriously alter everything, change tonight and the rest of everything. This isn’t exactly what he signed up for when he went in to sleep on his floor, but he isn’t disappointed. Cute Bram was holding his hand-- sliding his hand up and down Simon’s arm, and  _ oh, _ this was good, because Cute Bram is also Blue. It was such a revelation, and it made Simon feel all warm inside. 

 

“Truth or dare, Simon?”

 

Simon broke away from his thoughts, a small smile appearing across his lips. “Truth.”

 

“Are you surprised?”

 

Yes, he was. After so long Simon just figured he’d never find out who Blue was, that he’d spend the rest of his life looking back at it as a fond memory while he grew old and found people to help move on from it. Blue was just going to be his first love that began and ended junior year of high school. Everything is different now, drastically so, because Blue was sitting in front of him with almost teary eyes and a wobbly smile and he had a real name. For the first time, Blue was a person, and not just poetic words on his computer screen. Simon sucked in a breath, and decided to shake his head. Blue could have been anyone in the whole world, or at least at Creekwood High. But it was Bram, and that felt right.

 

“No, I’m not.” Simon whispered, and then licked over his lips. He saw Bram glance down, and Simon’s heart began to thud. “Truth or dare, Bram?” 

 

“Dare.”

 

And Simon hoped he wasn’t reading the situation wrong, but as he inched closer it was almost crystal clear he wasn’t. He didn’t know if it was the alcohol or the fact that Bram was all of sudden, quite literally, the love of his life, but he felt oh-so confident in the light of his colorful Christmas lights. “I dare you to kiss me.”

 

And then Bram did. It was urgent, and hard and felt like breathing, like it was necessary. Their lips moved like an erratic heartbeat, tongues lapping each other up. Simon didn’t know if it was the alcohol, or if it was everything that had ever lead up to this moment, but they kissed like they had been waiting for this moment the entirety of their existences. Bram’s hands began to wander, up under Simon’s shirt to his chest, and then the back of his torso and he pulled Simon closer until their bodies collided. Bram was the one to take his lips away and drag them down Simon’s throat, and then they were horizontal and it definitely wasn’t the alcohol, because Simon was kissing Blue. He had pictured this moment millions of times, but nothing could have ever compared to the realness of Bram’s lips sucking desperately at his neck. Simon wanted everything now, and everything now was leading up to. It felt much too overdue.

 

But they stopped.

 

Bram was straddling Simon when he pulled away again, and they were both panting and grinning and everything was buzzing and felt good. Simon propped himself up on his elbows and pressed a gentle kiss to Bram’s jaw, and he pushed Simon’s hair back.

 

“That was good.” Bram spoke, climbing off Simon. “That was,”

 

“It was everything.” Simon finished, he was flushed and dizzy off vodka and the taste of Bram in his mouth. There was a glimmer in Bram’s eyes and Simon knew this feeling was only the beginning.

 

“Jacques,” Bram drew a breath, and closed his eyes. He was so drunk. Simon’s head began to   spin, because the name felt so right in Bram’s mouth and for an instance, it felt like Blue was everywhere all at once, Bram was everywhere. Simon got closer, taking him in. “ _ Jacques,  _ have you ever been in love?” 

 

Simon was flustered, he  _ was, _ quite frankly, he was in love with this moment. He was in love with the air that smelled like them, with the sound of Bram’s whines and sighs, with Bram on top of him. But he was also really in love,  _ really _ in love. Simon knew Bram, he had loved him from the inside out from the beginning. Everything came rushing back, every feeling. “You didn’t ask truth or dare.”

 

“I don’t care.”  _ Oh.  _ Bram’s voice was raspy, his lips were swollen red.

 

Simon blinked, slowly, and moved to press his hand on Bram’s cheek. “I have.” And everything seemed to be falling into place. “And his name was Blue.” 

 

Bram laughed, and pressed his forehead against Simon’s.

 

Perhaps in the morning things would be different, but right now, they were Simon and Bram, giddy and sick with emotion, and they could worry about everything else later.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on twitter @ohnickrob <3
> 
> and due to popular demand in the comments (leave a comment btw (; ) there WILL be a second (maybe even third) chapter to this involving the morning after, ect. :) please bookmark and look out for it in the coming weeks!


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